9 Women on What They Really Want In Bed (But Don't Ask For)
January 28, 2016
These ladies are telling it like it is.
Do you really know what women want when things get hot and heavy? .
Lucky for you, we asked 9 real-life women what they want in bed. Some advice is straightforward (thankfully), but there are also a few subtleties here worth taking notes on.
They told us exactly what you need to know.
your sweet time.
“Spend more time teasing me before and during sex. Kiss and touch me all over, and make sure I’m really turned on before we have sex. Mix fast and rough passion with slower, gentle touches. Guys have become too impatient and selfish in their love-making.”
“Guys love it when girls moan, but they rarely do it themselves. It’s so hot when guys swear and grunt in pleasure during sex. It shows he’s really into it, which turns me on even more.”
“Use your fingers and rub my clit while we’re having sex. Like most women, I can’t orgasm from penetration alone, so get your fingers busy. Reach around and get me off with your hand when you’re fucking me from behind.”
be afraid to get a little kinky.
“I like freaky, rough sex, I want a man to spank my ass, lick my inner thigh, tie my hands together, and whisper something dirty in my ear while we have make love.”
Undress her slowly.
“Undress me slowly to make things sexier. Ripping our clothes off is hot sometimes, but what I really want is to be unwrapped like a present, slowly and deliberately, and for my sexy lingerie to be appreciated, because it’s all for you.”
sure you take care of her needs.
“All men focus on is finishing. Guys need to control that urge and give the chick time to enjoy. Make sure I have an orgasm too before you roll over and pass out.”
hot sex positions.
“I wish my guy would surprise me with some hot positions that are different than what we normally do, because I’m really over missionary and doggy style. Put my legs on your shoulders, or pick me up and take me to the kitchen and fuck me on the counter.”
her in the eye.
“Sex is way, way sexier when it’s intimate, and kissing and eye contact during making love is so hot. It makes everything feel so much more passionate, and that is a massive turn-on. Make out with me while you’re inside me, and kiss my neck and shoulders and everything else.”
it comes to foreplay, think outside the box.
"I like foreplay more than actually having sex, but foreplay is always over too fast and too soon. Tease me, talk dirty, and finger me until I’m dripping wet.”
Gentlemen, you heard it from the ladies themselves. You know what to do.
How Important is Sex for A Man
October 18, 2018
6 min read
While most women let emotional connection take precedence over a physical connection, for men sex is one of the many ways he shows love. Contrary to the popular belief that attributes men’s hunger for sex as selfish, men look at sex as a path to reach mutual satisfaction, render pleasure and thrill to their partner and improve as a lover.
However, the straight and crisp answer to “how important is sex for a man” is that sex is one of the most crucial reasons why men want to be in a relationship in the first place.
It sounds shallow but men are wired in a way that sex or the prospect of sex makes them attracted to a woman. Love comes into the picture well after the attraction episode.
You might wonder why it is that men care so much about sex. Or why is sex important to men? Women have wondered for years why this always proves to be one of the most important aspects of any relationship. Though sex matters to women at first, when they get comfortable in a relationship or when there are other things going on in the dynamic, then sex is often the first thing to go.
This will NEVER happen for a man, and there are deeper reasons to this than you might expect. There is a multitude of reasons why sex in a marriage is so important to men, and why it always will be.
Men need to have sex in a relationship because it shows strength
To understand the importance of sex in marriage, you have to look at this from a male point of view, and that may be hard at times.
Women need the romance, the passion, and the chemistry to tell her that the love is alive and going well.
Women need to be loved and cherished, and this is often through verbal signs of affection. Men, on the other hand, are very straightforward and almost primal in their needs. They need to have sex in a relationship because it shows strength and unity.
Though sex may be just another chore for women, this will never be the case for men, men need sex. This is how men see that the relationship is alive and strong, and when that is missing he starts to panic. He needs sex to ensure that you are happy together and that you are both getting what you need out of the relationship with one another.
Sex matters to men in any relationship, and now you can understand exactly why that is—understanding the importance of sex can really ensure that you keep this as a priority to show him that you love him and care about your relationship!
Here’s why sex is important to men in a marriage
Sex is the way men connect
If you want to know how men think about sex in a relationship, then think of it as the one thing that keeps you connected.
No matter what else is going on or how far apart you may feel at times, sex is what unites you. It shows him that you make him a priority and that you will always care about how he feels.
Yes, it really is that important to him and so when he sees that you are making sex in a relationship a priority, he will stay committed to you and know that you feel the same way about him. He needs this connection, for it’s less about just physical intimacy and more about staying strong as a couple in a way that he really understands and appreciates. This is why sex is so important to men.
Sex is a way to stay close
Even if you have a fight, you may use sex to reiterate that connection. In his mind, you are showing that you are close to one another when you are physical with one another. This is your connection, this is your bond, and this is how you show that you love each other.
The importance of sex in marriage cannot be undermined if you are looking at creating a lasting bond with your partner and enhance the happiness in your relationship.
Sure words are nice, but this very physical act helps him to see that things are good and that you are happy with one another.
He needs that reassurance, and he needs to have sex in a relationship to show that you are a well-aligned couple.
When the sex is good and it’s present, then he can move forward knowing that he has a partner and that makes him happy. The importance of sex in a relationship to him means that there is a true bond present and it’s alive and kicking!
Sex is a way to unite
Sex in a relationship means that this is how you unite, even when everything else is stressful or you have a disagreement.
You as a woman may not understand it but if sex isn’t present then he’s immediately concerned and knows that something is wrong. It helps him to see that everything is really okay and that he can look at you as a partner in the long term.
Other key facts on why sex is so important for men
The male ego is often tied to sex
A man’s ego can be very fragile.
Why sex is important is because most often sex is tied to his ego since that is what motivates him, keeps him going.
It is so important for him to please his woman and if she dismisses bedroom problems constantly, then he may take it very personally. If you have intimacy issues, talk about it (in a manner that won’t hurt his ego) with him. Men do appreciate honesty as well.
Men see sex as a celebration
Men wish women would take more of a ‘carpe diem’ approach to sex. On the long list of our priorities, sex should not be on the bottom rung.” says Dr Schaefer. Importance of sex has always been primitive to most men.
Men want women to make sex a priority.
Sure, in a marriage, there could be loads of other important tasks and decisions to be made on a daily basis. But, for the health and longevity of the relationship, sex must always be prioritized. And if you consciously do that, think of the other benefits: sex alleviates anxiety and stress, reduces blood pressure, promotes healing and bonding.
Men love fantasies
Men want to share their fantasies but worry their wives will shame or judge them,” says Dr Kort.
Encourage your man to speak his heart out to you. Why stick to the same old routine day after day? Ask him what excites him and then go with the flow.
You can even reveal your own fantasies with him and open yourself to these possibilities.
Men love sex for sex’s sake
“Men want their wives to enjoy raw sex, not just endure it or take it personally. For men, it’s not about dominating a woman, but ravishing her” says Joe Kort, PhD, a psychotherapist and sexologist. What’s best, then? At times, enjoy some ‘throw-me-down’ sex with your man!
Men love praise
Men are no different from women when it comes to compliments! When you compliment your man, it boosts his sexual confidence.
This praise can be showered before and after your intimate moments. Men are conditioned to constantly worry about things like size, performance and the like. That’s a lot of pressure on them. However, when you share positive affirmations with him, it not only takes the pressure off but lets him know that you deeply love and care for him too.
No matter what else is going on, your man can look for sex in a relationship with you and know that he will always have that with you—this is how you remain united and bridge the gap even if there is a temporary setback. He cares about you and he wants to show you that in a physical manner.
This is how he does that, so remember that sex will always be of great importance to him!
4 Ways to Help Him Last Longer in Bed
March 2, 2017
It's no secret that many men have an easier time reaching orgasm than many women. That, coupled with the fact that premature ejaculation is the most common sexual disorder in men under 40, means you may frequently find yourself unsatisfied once he's finished. It can be a real let-down to realize his fun is over before you've hardly started.
While you could get him to finish the job by some other means, another solution is to help him last longer in bed. Here are four methods to try.
1. Take it slow
To get your guy to last longer, have him start slow, Men's Fitness magazine suggests. Tell him to aim for one thrust every few seconds, then gradually (like, every two minutes) take it up a notch, to the point where there's a thrust every second or so. If he feels like he's going to come, he should stop thrusting and wait a few seconds until he can control himself and start up again.
2. Do it again and again
A round of vigorous foreplay before sex can work wonders, according to Cosmopolitan magazine. Not only can you orgasm, which might make you more likely to come again during sex, but getting him to ejaculate before the main event should delay the finish line. For many guys, it takes a certain amount of time to "recharge," which means you should have plenty of time to be satisfied.
4. Use a condom
Ask a guy who doesn't like wearing condoms why he feels that way and he's bound to tell you, "It doesn't feel as good." Sex with a condom definitely feels different, and you can take advantage of this to get your guy to last longer. The sensations on his penis will be slightly weaker with a condom on, which might translate to longer sex sessions.
5. Switch up the position
If your guy has a go-to move that always gets him off, switch it up. Cosmopolitan suggests missionary or girl-on-top, which can help many men delay the finale. (Skip doggy-style.)